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A Row in the Dark - Canoe Company - No Palolo - Extempore Regatta - Omahs - Nearly Capsized - Good-bye for the Time - Remarks on Receptions - Advisership again - Consult the Consuls - Talolos.

BFFORE daylight this morning we were aroused, and soon in the boat en route for the passage in the reef where the Palolo were expected to assemble in their millions for their annual single hour's outing, either that morning or in four weeks' time.

After an hour's slow rowing in the dark we arrived somewhere, at what particular spot it was impossible to tell; but judging from the heaving of the boat, we knew that we must be where the sea had an uninterrupted passage through the reef, whose immediate presence was announced by the deafening boom of the breakers dashing on it.

We were soon aware that we were not the first arrivals, for, lying on our oars whilst the mysterious change heralding the approach of light was taking place, we could catch occasional glimpses of canoes swiftly and noiselessly gliding about, ghost-like in the murky gloom. It was the hour, just before daylight, when the darkness clings and seems reluctant to leave the ink-like black waves, only just to be distinguished in blunt outline against the scarcely less dismal-coloured sky.

A huge smooth oily swell was setting in through the reef-opening, giving the canoes, as they rode over it, the appearance of leaping aloft right out of the water, a sight most bewildering to see. As soon as there was sufficient light, we found that we were in the company of quite fifty canoes of all sorts and sizes, prettily and lightly balancing themselves, for a moment at a time, on the summits of the swells as they sullenly rolled in through the now visible passage, guarded on both sides by an expanse of seething water, where the interrupting coral bars the onward course of the ever-persistent billows.

As the light grew apace everyone there, scoop in hand, prepared alike for business and for a practical joke, which here consists in upsetting one another's canoes; and each one determined, with light heart devoid of all care, to make the best of the most cherished though shortest annual festival.

The canoes now scattered about in all directions, the occupants anxiously scanning the water as they flitted here, there and everywhere in search of the game, but with no result. The little animals had evidently determined upon availing themselves of the four weeks' grace that nature, in obedience to some inexplicable law or in some freak, had granted them.

The natives soon made up their minds, and turning their canoes shoreward, went off at top-speed, regatta style, shouting and laughing, the devil take the hindmost, to their diurnal occupations; and the last we saw of that merry band was their becoming indistinguishable in the distance' under a cloud of spray, thrown up by the desperate strokes of their busily-plied paddles, first one side then the other, in their frantic race for first home.

Against my wish we went out to sea through the passage, intending to return again to its shelter some distance to windward, which would bring us in about opposite to the house where we were staying. There was a very decent lump of a swell on, but nothing dangerous to a good boat's crew.

I knew that these swells in certain localities had an awkward habit, even in the calmest weather, of suddenly developing a crest, making boat-travelling most dangerous. The natives call these suddenly breaking swells 'omahs,' and treat them with the greatest respect.

What causes these intermittent dangers, peculiar to certain localities, no one has as yet satisfactorily explained; but there they exist, and although for a week or more not a break is to be seen, they are liable to rise and capsize a passing boat at any moment.

To make things more unsafe, I saw that the coxswain had taken to flirting with our lovely young friend of the village, who, as in duty bound, was seeing us safely through our perils on the deep. These two were dividing the steering between them, taking charge of a yoke-line apiece, which did not make me feel any the more at home with the navigation, but it was of no use to object.

We kept about a hundred yards from the edge of the reef, near enough to see well and safely the enormous bodies of water that were continually passing beneath our keel, and which on meeting the opposing reef would rise high in the air, and with suddenly developed mighty crests, furiously dash against the obstacle; then, pounding down upon the unflinching barrier with a thundering crash, rebound heavenwards in myriads of fountains of feathery spray, but only to roll ignominiously back again and rejoin the ocean from whence they came, with a curiously audible sighing, seething hiss, as of powerless and ineffectual hate, each saying, as it were, to the succeeding wave, 'Avenge me; I am crushed, and no longer able to contend.'

Everything went right for about half a mile, when suddenly a great wave with a towering white crest upon it, one of the very identical 'omahs' of note, came rolling in straight to us from seaward. I at once called to our dual steering-gear to throw the boat's head up towards the wave, and to the crew to pull a few hard strokes to give us way to go through it, but neither one nor the other responded; the former left off rowing entirely, to stare vacantly at the 'omah' coming down upon us broadside on, Whilst the steering, as I anticipated, should occasion be required for sharp work, broke down altogether, for each part of the dual apparatus tugged frantically at his and her line, with the effect of producing no steering at all.

How we got through that wave and even survived a second smaller one that followed immediately afterwards, I can't imagine; I only know that we ought too have capsized.

At last we got safely in through a handy crack in the reef, and arrived at our destination. After breakfast, and a bath-attended, as before, by our dusky chaperon, who this time was given no opportunity for annexing her perquisite, the soap-we sent the boat on to meet us at a village farther down the coast, and started off on our return voyage, escorted by the lovely creature who had 'been so attentive to us during our short stay with our friends at Falelatai.

In an hour we picked up our boat, and after an affectionate farewell-made all the more touching, at the expense of romance, by the presentation of a dollar or two-we embarked, and were soon bowling gaily along on the home track with a fair wind; but this time I took the helm.

At Falelatai our reception and treatment was perfect. Our hostess, in a quiet and most unobtrusive way, made us feel at home at once; although I must confess that, in my condition of 'new chum,' I did feel rather abroad under the bathing regime. We got to Apia the same evening, and thus finished my first trip.

Time now for some weeks hung very heavily on my hands, to the unpleasantness of which was added the sickening consequent on acclimatization, and what with prickly-heat and slight febrile attacks, together with having to fight mosquitoes and flies all day, I had rather a bad time of it.

It gave me, however, plenty of liberty to consider my position that was intended to be, and to make inquiries with regard to the native advisership and its duties.

I could hear from all sides nothing but the most dismal tales of trouble upon trouble, intrigue upon intrigue, bribery, corruption, and lying, which foreshadowed an amount of disagreeable work that no single white man could ever conscientiously get through, even if he could be in a dozen or more places at the same time.

Alone I could see my way to nothing but dismal failure; for, in my opinion, to carry out the duties there should be a reliable white man in each province and that was an impossibility, there being nothing to bear the expense.

I consulted the Consuls as to the support I might expect from them, and received very similar answers from each, to the effect that, so long as my efforts pleased each one individually, so long would each individual Consul approve of them; but should my measures meet with individual or collective disapprobation, steps collective or individual would be instituted for their suppression.

I was thus to have four masters of different nationalities, and at times of direct antagonistic interests, and to please the lot.

The thing was absurd, so I wrote to the King, declining the honour of his service.

On the 4th of November I went to see a Talolo or food-offering to some Tongan visitors, and was greatly interested with my first sight of a Samoan ceremony. One description of a Talolo will serve for all.

There are several kinds of Talolo observed, each one having its own distinct significance and importance. The Talolo proper is the presentation of food, whatever may be the object, of a whole district, the resources of which are put under general contribution for the purpose. The scene of operations is the Malae or town square, in which all public meetings of whatsoever description are held.

Here, in the shade of some house or tree, the recipients of the compliment will seat themselves in solemn state, and with the most profound gravity await the coming event. Beyond this and the houses in the immediate vicinity being unusually full of sight-seers, and perhaps a knot or two of strangers gathered together under the shade of some convenient tree, there is nothing to indicate that any unusual occurrence is about to take place.

In the neighbouring bush, however, or at all events out of sight, the chiefs of the bearers are marshalling their processions, and putting the finishing-touches to their own gorgeous array. Here is a busy scene, crowds are hard at work painting, oiling, and otherwise getting themselves up within an inch of their lives in all methods that severe Samoan masherdom demands.

All are dressed in their very best, or the very best they can borrow from their friends, and shining, with as much oil as will cling to their bodies. The oiling department is severely attended to by the ladies of the company, who are to be seen very busy (going from one to another greasing them up in the latest approved fashion. The chiefs are most particularly dressed in full war-paint, their extraordinary fighting head-dresses of human hair standing about two feet high above a bandeau of gleaming pearl-shell knobs clasped round the forehead. In the centre of the hair plume, immediately above the bandeau, worn as an aigrette securing a bunch of the long red feathers of the boatswain - bird, is fastened a round mirror of about three inches diameter. The inevitable necklace of scarlet pandanus fruit is there; round the waist is the usual green bushcreeper girdle, with two or three fine mats for full dress; and club or spear in hand, with bodies redolent and shining with perfumed oil, the head-men stand ready to lead their divisions.

The maids of the district, too, are there, bare to the waist, and attired in all the barbaric splendour they can muster, sporting anklets and what I suppose may be termed kneelets of leaves; proud as they possibly can be, letting every outsider know it, they stand ready, able and willing to do their best for the credit of their different towns, and to assist their chiefs in working their followers into a sufficient state of noisy hospitality, worthy of a nation to whom entertainment of strangers is a fixed principle.

Attached to each division are funny men grotesquely arrayed, at whose antics during the march all spectators are bound to laugh, and whose sayings, witty or not, are sure to bring down the gallery. Samoan jokes are, however, untranslatable, being of a nature that, if printed, would ensure the suppression of the medium for their circulation.

Everything ready, each division will form up in a column four-deep, with all the intended gifts shouldered-and a most comprehensive lot it is. Barrels of beef, pork and salt salmon, roasted and live pigs of all sizes, tins of biscuits of all sorts, live fowls, taro, yams, tinned meats of all descriptions generally recognised under the head of 'peasoopo'-a name, I believe, adopted from the fact that the first canned provision the Samoans ever saw was the preserved peasoup that the visiting whalers used to carry. Everyone must offer something, even if it is only a single biscuit. With a loud shout the provision train, headed by its chiefs and maids, issues from its hiding-place, and, all chanting loudly a song, of welcome or their particular district song, one division will march slowly towards the Malae, where sit, with the most dignified stoicism, the recipients of the honour, to all appearance unaware of, or indifferent to, what is going on. The whole time of the advance the chiefs and maids, not to mention the buffoons, are hard at work dancing in front or round their men in a great state of excitement. Every now and again one of them, not omitting the maids, will trot out in front of the brigade, go through all the postures of real warfare with spear or club, and then retire to the men.

The buffoons employ themselves chiefly with the spectators, lavishing upon them large doses of the usual Samoan style of plaisanterie, in return for their roars of appreciative laughter. High chiefs generally have some wretched little humpbacked dwarf in their suite, who, impishly capering about with an exaggerated swagger, adds no little to the universal fun. As the troops get nearer and nearer their destination, the fun becomes wilder in proportion. Clubs and axes are hurled in the air and cleverly caught descending, or whirled round and round the bodies and under the arms and legs of the warriors with great dexterity, until at last the march is ended, and with one great shout, more like a huge sigh of gratification on being, relieved of a heavy burden, each man deposits his load in front of the recipients, and then retires to some appointed spot on the edge of the Malae, where that particular division will sit down in a group, making room for the other divisions to come on in like manner.

So proceeds the Talolo until each division has performed its appointed duty, and all are calmly seated preparatory to the delivery of speeches, without a fair share of which no Samoan meeting is complete. Everything is now as quiet as a Quakers' meeting for some little time, when one of the donors of the good things, generally the chief talking-man of the district, will rise, and, throwing his fly-flap across his shoulder and gracefully leaning on his long orator's staff with both hands, his head inclined on them, stand, as it were, mutely seeking inspiration for the speech he is about to make, although there is very little meditation needed to get an oration from a Samoan. At last, having satisfied native etiquette by a sufficient pause, he begins, usually calling over all the titles of his division and of those present, which takes no little time; he then profusely loads the objects of the show with the most high-flown compliments, both personally and in honour of the position they may be holding.

He invokes all conceivable blessings on the happy day that has been so fortunate as to give them a most unworthy set of men-the never-to-be sufficiently appreciated honour of so distinguished a set of visitors, or so enlightened a Government, as the case may be, who have so graciously deigned to receive their worthless offerings. After having thoroughly run himself out of compliments, he will launch into apologies for the poverty of their gifts, asking the recipients over and over again to be so good as to excuse the poverty of the country.

When the first speaker has completely exhausted all the compliments and apologies that he can remember or invent, he takes a back seat amongst his crowd, giving the other side an opportunity for reply. A decent interval having elapsed, the leading talkingman of the opposite side starts up, and after precisely the same preliminaries as narrated above, which are de rigueur). in Samoan oratory, he will, elaborately and with care, proceed to return more than verbatim all the compliments paid to his side by the donors of the Talolo, and of course praise in most lofty terms the prodigal liberality shown in the gifts bestowed; and if he is a visitor, no description of what Utopia should be is sufficiently high-toned to express adequately the appreciation by himself and crowd of the beatific country they have had the good fortune to visit. When the principals have finished, anyone of position who may wish to air his rhetoric may take a hand; and all Samoans being born orators, the complimentary mill is ground ad nauseam, at all events to the papalagi (foreign spectator) who, by-the-bye, has no concern whatever in the matter but curiosity.

All talking over, the hosts generally depart, leaving the visitors to their own devices. One, or perhaps two of the party then go amongst the gifts, and loudly proclaim their quantity and description; an equitable division of them then being made with marvellous rapidity and accuracy.

How it is done is most astonishing to a looker-on, a mistake rarely occurring. Not only has the stuff to be divided quite equally with regard to quantity, but certain portions are the perquisites of certain ranks, and care has to be taken that these are told off to the proper persons. Any mistake would most inevitably cause a man who considered himself slighted, to refuse the share allotted him, as being inferior to the claims of the position he holds, and perhaps be the means of a general row, even leading up to the Commencement of a war. Many a serious fight in Samoa has had its origin in such a manner. Sometimes the food will be eaten on the spot, when all will join in its discussion, and what remains will be carefully gathered into baskets and carried off to the various houses for future consumption.

Whilst on the ground watching the Talolo, old 'Tekori' came up to me, and said that the Government were about to put up a house for me, when I could immediately take office. I could see that the cunning old man had been made acquainted with my letter of refusal, and wanted to ignore it altogether; so, informing him that I had written to the King refusing the billet, I shook hands and left him there, wondering that any white man should refuse a chance which up to that time many had been fighting for.

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